Mr. Peabody & Sherman  (2014)    63/100

Rating :   63/100                                                                       92 Min        U

The latest animation from Dreamworks is based on characters from the 1960’s The Rocky and Bullwinkle Show’, and focuses on the father and adopted son relationship of Mr Peabody (Ty Burrell), who happens to be a preternaturally intelligent canine that can talk, is a fully functional member of society and has invented, secretly, time travel, and his young human son Sherman (Max Charles) that he finds abandoned in an alleyway one day and who bizarrely has an IQ much closer to that of the average dog than any well adjusted member of mankind. This is the fundamental problem with the film – although the animation is fine, the protagonist is just too stupid, and his idiocy continues to set up most of the drama in the story as we see him bullied by a girl at school, who then bullies him into taking her on a jaunt through time and space.

It’s not without moral backbone, however, as Peabody attempts to rectify his son’s trouble at school by inviting the young demon and her parents over for dinner, delivering two surprisingly deep philosophical quotes to try and sell the idea to Sherman about the strongest relationships evolving through conflict and issues of self-reflection in hatred. As the narrative continues the father will have to learn to have more faith in his son and give him a bit more freedom, just as Sherman will come to see that the rules he has handed down to him have his own welfare at their heart, and the girl, Penny (Ariel Winter), will need to be rescued several times over and eventually stop being such a pain. A couple of nice jokes for adults, and perhaps a fun spattering of history for youngsters, including ancient Egypt, da Vinci and the Renaissance, the French Revolution and the siege of Troy, almost like ‘Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure’ (89) for a younger demographic (although the time machine here is remarkably similar to the one in ‘Free Birds’ for some reason), it will probably be entertaining enough for kids but I do question whether Sherman is simply so dim and irresponsible that he sets a bad example rather than functioning as the intended parabolic vehicle.

The Lego Movie  (2014)    70/100

Rating :   70/100                                                                     100 Min        U

Lego, one of the most enduring and popular toys of the last century (the name comes from the Danish ‘leg godt’ meaning ‘play well’) took a surprisingly long time to bring itself onto the big-screen given the success of the Transformers franchise and the completely unmerited monetary haul of the G.I. Joe films. Here everything, not surprisingly, is made from Lego and all digitally mastered together into a traditional tale of the underdog, Emmet Brickowski (Chris Pratt) – an unexceptional everyday Lego worker with no friends to speak of but who never has a bad word to say about anybody, who must realise his own potential and learn how to help others do the same (with the help of the Master Builders, who can creatively construct things from Lego without using a rulebook, don’t you know) all to undermine the dastardly plans of PRESIDENT BUSINESS (Will Ferrell) who can’t stand all those pesky Master Builders ruining his otherwise regimented and ordered Lego universe. But does Emmet have what it takes?

Initially the story and comedy value are a little flat, and a little predictable, and songs like ‘Everything is Awesome’ (the only song in this incidentally, it’s not a musical) are a little grating, but then … it becomes catchy! And the bland component parts eventually become endearing, partly due to an array of likeable characters, such as Batman (Will Arnett), Bad Cop/Good Cop (Liam Neeson) and Unikitty (Alison Brie), the leader of Cloud Cuckoo Land, domain of rainbows and puppies, who variously becomes Biznesskitty and Iwillripyourfuckingfaceoffifyoudothatagainkitty. Along with everything, she too, is awesome. Overall, it’s a fun trip guaranteed to spike sales of Lego and with a good message at it’s heart of creative self expression and the importance of appreciating this as a universal concept.

Lone Survivor  (2013)    30/100

Rating :   30/100                                                                     121 Min        15

A huge opportunity missed here as what could have been a tight, thrilling and quite moving war piece based on a true incident taking place in Afghanistan in 2005, descends into complete farce and jingoism with the main American soldiers each being shot about five hundred times, exclaiming ‘damn it’ with each hit as if they’d merely been stung by some nettles as blood spurts everywhere all leading up to dramatic Boromir style death scenes in slow motion with the sun setting on the picturesque landscape surrounding them. The title itself completely blows much of the story as for anyone who wasn’t aware of the details (the vast majority of viewers one imagines) we know only one of the four man team survives, and the very beginning compacts this gross error by showing it is very clearly going to be Mark Wahlberg’s character Marcus Luttrell, and indeed the film is based on Luttrell’s novel recounting events as they happened on the ground (reputedly his original report put enemy troop numbers at circa 20 -30, then in his book they became more like 200, whilst an alternative novel published about the operation puts them at more like 9 or 10).

The other three combatants are played by Emile Hirsch, Taylor Kitsch and Ben Foster, and, frankly, if I died fighting for my country I’d be pretty pissed off with some of these casting choices, and the film opens, after some decent real army footage, with what seems to be some sort of homosexual soft porno with the focus on the bodies of the men instead of the camaraderie or characters. Without knowing the exact details of the events that actually occurred, their assignment according to the film was to covertly approach an Afghan village and take out a Taliban leader, or ‘the bad guys’ as they put it, thought to be there, but it many ways it seems doomed from the beginning. They quickly find the mountains are making radio communication impossible – how is it they didn’t factor that in? It surely cannot have come as a surprise. Then they encounter their first major obstacle and make a complete dog’s breakfast of it, before failing to properly conceal themselves in what seems pretty good terrain to disappear in, especially if there are only four of you. Not only this, but instead of both hiding themselves and also preparing cover where they would have the advantage, they elect to run at the superior numbers taking very little precaution with cover (but when you can take multiple bullets without even noticing I guess that’s not so much of an issue), and then, when they should once again be trying to disappear, they loudly call out to each other creating a very, very easy duck hunt for the people trying to kill them.

It ends with what is actually a very moving tribute to the real men that lost their lives there, but this is cheating – an emotional punch at the end that people are naturally going to feel and empathise with and yet it cannot make up for the majority of the film being terrible. I say the majority – the last quarter of the story has more of a heart to it, which took me by surprise, and some of the scenes at least successfully begin to set up tension, with at least one of them slightly uncomfortable viewing, as was intended by the clever way it was shot. However, when you are watching the main characters effectively play Cowboys and Indians and pretending to be riddled with lead and hit every bone of their bodies off rocks, still calmly delivering cheesy lines to one another, then the thing is sunk without any real hope of redemption. This is entirely the fault of director Peter Berg as he not only helmed the project but also wrote the screenplay, in fact, and I may be misremembering this, but I think he tells us he is the director twice during the opening credits. His last film was ‘Battleship’ (12) and this is in the same league as that, notwithstanding the real world relevance.

I, Frankenstein  (2014)    67/100

Rating :   67/100                                                                       92 Min        12A

This is a pretty awesome, bad film. Given the concept is that Frankenstein’s monster has not only robbed his creator of his name, but has also managed to survive until the present day and get himself involved in an eternal battle between demons and gargoyles (yes, that’s right, gargoyles – but ones that can transform into attractive humans and which serve the powers of good) that, naturally, humans are blissfully unaware of, the discovery that this is a bit rough around the edges with bad dialogue and a fair amount of ropey acting, isn’t really an astonishing surprise.

In the beginning we see Mr F dealing with a few family issues, and his voiceover comes to us ‘I though it was the end ..(long pause).. But ..(long pause).. It was just the beginning’ and we very quickly assume this is going to be a nightmare to sit through. Responsible for the somewhat lacking screenplay is Stuart Beattie, but credit where credit’s due – in his dual role as the director he has also created some pretty cool action sequences and somehow gelled everything into a very flawed, and yet very likeable film. Aaron Eckhart can take a lot of credit for anchoring the piece as Frankenstein, getting the tone spot on in what can’t have been an easy role to play, and Yvonne Strahovski as the hot blonde scientist in tight jeans adds the right touch of schlock sex appeal and the two of them, as well as the rest of the cast (Miranda Otto, Jai Courtney and Bill Nighy are in support – with the latter of those gleefully delivering his cheesy lines), with the direction, weave the right threads of ridiculousness and entertainment unashamedly together.

Not sure if this would work as well on the small screen, but I went into this in a foul and vituperative state of mind, and I left in a good mood. I’d recommend it if you’re feeling the same way.

That Awkward Moment  (2014)    0/100

Rating :   0/100           COMPLETE INCINERATION           94 Min        15

If you want to see a film where none of the characters feel like real people then watch this, which is essentially the epitome of woeful modern day romcoms. It’s a very, very familiar set up of three guys who, for the most part, praise the virtues of singledom and sleeping around, but whom we just know will be convinced of the error of their ways by the female characters we are about to be introduced to. The three guys (played by Miles Teller, Zac Efron and Michael B. Jordan) couldn’t be any less charismatic and nothing they do or say makes any sense. One of them is annoying to the point where I cannot seriously believe any person would want to be near him without striking him in the face, never mind be friends or otherwise with him. Another thinks the girl he’s just hooked up with might actually be a hooker and so he bolts first thing the morning after, except of course it’s painfully obvious she isn’t, then despite falling for her and dating/sleeping with her he elects not to turn up for her father’s funeral, her father that he met and got along with, as he figures if he goes that means they are officially an ‘item’. This forms the ‘moment guy will fuck up and realise he really was in love as now he is lonely and everyone else hates him’, but seriously, not going to her father’s funeral? That’s a new improbable romcom low, but not apparently so low that she can’t forgive him after he eats a mediocre amount of public humble pie. Imogen Poots plays the not prostitute, but even her natural beauty and charm are not enough to redeem this at all, it’s so far removed from the sphere of likeability and reality as to be just vile.

Out of the Furnace  (2013)    71/100

Rating :   71/100                                                                     116 Min        15

A dark, perhaps a little too dark, tale focusing on two brothers in a small American town dominated by the steel works that one of them works in. Life is tough, and for the other brother who has returned from several tours of duty in the Middle East full of bile and hatred, the only thing he feels he can do now is fight for money. Cue the ‘just one last fight’ line and we know bad things are going to happen. It’s a brutal tale of violence, desperation, regret and revenge, very well acted by Christian Bale, Willem Dafoe, Woody Harrelson, Zoe Saldana and Forest Whitaker (Casey Affleck also appears but he really needs to take some diction lessons) and it’s a film that, although it hides nothing, it does throw an uneasiness at the audience, forcing them to ponder and consider it.

My Perestroika  (2010)    63/100

Rating :   63/100                                                                                        88 Min

A documentary focusing on several Muscovites that lived through the dissolution of the Soviet Union and asking them to compare living now in modern day Russia, with living and going to school under communism. They were all classmates and all experienced the attempted coup in 1991 by party hardliners, with some of them taking part in the demonstrations against it. It’s really interesting listening to their comments on the before and after, with some of them laughing in almost disbelief at some of the things they used to take for granted under the heavy Soviet indoctrination, and yet others pointing out that so long as you turned up for work and were not an alcoholic then you had a job for life and didn’t have to worry about being fired, and so on. The discussion is fascinating, but apart from interviews with the same handful of people and the mixing in of archival footage (a lot of which contains the interviewees, possibly why they were chosen for the project) the film doesn’t really do much else, so it remains nothing more than a social snapshot, albeit still a worthwhile one.

(The title translates as ‘My Reconstruction’ or ‘My Rebuilding’)

Jack Ryan : Shadow Recruit  (2014)    73/100

Rating :   73/100                                                                     105 Min        12A

Finally – a new Keira Knightley film woohoo! No doubt everyone was as distraught as I was when last year didn’t feature miss Knightley in any film on general release, but here she is back on fine form as Cathy, the wife of the late Tom Clancy’s long running fictional character Jack Ryan, with Chris Pine filling in his shoes – he has been previously played by Alec Baldwin (‘The Hunt for Red October’ 90), Harrison Ford (‘Patriot Games’ 92, ‘Clear and Present Danger’ 94) and Ben Affleck (‘The Sum of All Fears’ 02). The role of his wife was a fairly small one in the previous films, and screenwriters Adam Cozad and David Koepp have done a good job of writing her a larger part whilst managing the difficult task of avoiding it becoming too cheesy or predictable, although despite the end of the cold war, the Russians are still the bad guys.

Clancy passed away last October (the film is dedicated to him), and this is the first movie to feature his characters but to not be based on one of his novels, and one does wonder what he would make of it. It’s a series reboot, with Ryan initially an economics student in London who becomes galvanised to join the Marines after the 9/11 attacks on New York. He receives a crippling back injury and is close to despair when he is recruited as an analyst for the CIA but also meets Cathy as the undergrad doctor who promises to go to dinner with him if he dedicates himself to his physical recovery. If only Keira had won the role of Catwoman in ‘The Dark Knight Rises’, poor old Bruce Wayne wouldn’t have had to get punched in the back and thrown down into a grotty hole to recover from his spinal fracture. Indeed, pretty sure if she went around the NHS wards and made similar propositions we might see a remarkable recovery rate in patients ….

“Keira Knightley says she’ll go on a date with you if you get better.”
“…what?”
“Yeah, she said she wanted to give sick people something to live for.”
“Are you fucking shitting me?! Quick, cancel all my visits – give me that fucking water {stands} I’m better! {vomits} Get off me! I’ll be fine!”

The film has almost certainly been inspired by the reboot to the Bond franchise, and there are possibly a few nods in its direction, with an inaugural fight in a toilet and a few camera shots of glass elevators similar to the ones in both ‘Casino Royale’ (06) and ‘Skyfall’ (12) as well as a set up not too dissimilar to the one in Skyfall’s Shanghai skyscraper scene, not to mention putting the character name in the title of course. Kenneth Branagh directs and stars as the Russian bad guy, with the trailer making his accent sound a little ropey (the trailer and marketing for the film was not great in general) but its actually pretty good, and Keira sports a new American one (she has several – she is very talented), the two of them, Pine, and Kevin Costner as Ryan’s CIA contact all sell the film well with their combined talents and, together with tight direction, it all comes together nicely as a good, fun, spy thriller. It amply supplies the base for a new franchise and although it’s not quite in the same league as ‘Casino Royale’, there are plenty of good things to build on for the next one …

Inside Llewyn Davis  (2013)    55/100

Rating :   55/100                                                                     104 Min        15

I feel somewhat duped by this film. My interpretation of all the marketing and advertising led me to believe that this was to be a life affirming, heart warming tale that would see the audience identify and sympathise with the ‘up against it’ struggling singer/songwriter Llewyn Davis in New York City 1961, and maybe spark a newfound romantic interest in the music of the era. Unfortunately, Llewyn is A TOTAL SHIT and his character is on a steady decline from start to finish ultimately leaving no room for redemption whatsoever (the cat he is so often advertised with most certainly will have wished it’d never crossed paths with him).

As a character study, this is ok. As an uplifting experience, you can forget it, and it has precious little to do with the music scene of the day, but rather we just watch the protagonist fail at everything and bemoan his chosen profession until, as things plummet even further for him, we see and hear a young Bob Dylan take to the stage behind him, the assumption being that it was his negative personality and amoral character that led to his continual mishaps rather than the industry which was about to propel Dylan into the stratosphere of international stardom.

Support from the likes of Carey Mulligan, Justin Timberlake and John Goodman is fleeting but fine, Garrett Hedlund appears as what seems to be a parody of his character in ‘On the Road’, which The Red Dragon appreciated, and Oscar Isaac is good in the central role of Davis. The rest of the production very much straddles a dangerous divide – the music is good, but verges on dull monotony, the cinematography is unique and distinctive, yet comes close to administering a soporific faded tinge to everything. It’s a gloomy film, and the attempts at humour dotted throughout do precious little to ameliorate the cheap and nasty feeling it ultimately delivers.

August : Osage County  (2013)    74/100

Rating :   74/100                                                                     121 Min        15

Situated where the viewer is in the photo above, at the head of the Weston family table in Osage County Oklahoma, sits the acting powerhouse that is Meryl Streep – here embodying the pill popping, anarchic, virago matriarch of the family, who have all gathered to mourn the passing of her husband, and who all probably harbour secret suspicions that he committed suicide just to get away from his harpy of a wife. It’s from the Pulitzer winning play by Tracy Letts, who also wrote the screenplay, and despite the wealth of other acting talent present it is another film driven home by the sheer force and power of Streep, who torments everyone around her and drags all of their dirty laundry out into the open for debate, with the vast majority of the film taking place over a few days in her isolated and slightly decrepit home.

It’s depressing, but also compelling, with strong support all round and especially good turns from Julia Roberts and Benedict Cumberbatch. The film also sees Streep and Roberts up for best actress and best supporting actress respectively at the Oscars later this year.